One

For weeks, these sentences have swirled around in my head. So, last night, the night before my second baby turned one, I stayed up late writing you this teary mommy letter. This is the first of many, so prepare yourself.

Mira Joy,

Today you are ONE!

On this day, one year ago, we locked eyes for the first time.  I remember wondering what you were thinking about in that moment. I remember the intensity of your stare, and I couldn’t help but think you were actually daring me to take you on, asking if I was ready for what you had in store.

The truth is I wasn’t.

I was unprepared for the crying, the clinginess and the cautious way in which to handle you.  I was unprepared for the never ending nights and bleary eyed days.  Mostly, I was so utterly unprepared for the fierceness of the love I would have for you as I learned to be your mom.

You have stretched my body, pushed my limits and opened my eyes. You have healed deep fears while bringing new strengths to the surface. In a way, we grew together over the past year. 

You learned to laugh, and I learned that is my new favorite sound in life.

You learned to growl when you don’t get your bottle the minute you wake up and I learned that you are a girl who knows exactly what she wants.

You learned to say “dada” and I learned “mama” really is harder to say.

You learned to use your body to get to where you want, and I learned that nothing will ever get in your way.

You learned to eat solids, and I learned you don’t care what it is you are eating, as long as it arrives fast.

You learned to interact with your boisterous big sister, and I learned you are the luckiest girls to have each other.

You learned to flirt with your eyes, and I learned that those baby blues are the most soulful I have ever seen.

You learned to endure challenges no baby should have to, and I learned you are the bravest person I know.

Above all, I hope you’ve learned that my love for you is deeper than the ocean, more powerful than the currents, brighter than the July sun and I plan to spend the rest of my life making sure you know that.

I hope that when you read this letter, years down the road, you will smile, and know that the day you were born you altered the course of our lives, in the best way possible.  My first year as your mother was a crazy and beautiful adventure and I look forward to everything you have in store for all of us.

Happy 1st  Birthday to our sweet, funny, strong, beautiful miracle. 

Your Mommy, Daddy and Sister love you very much.